...aesthetic...

CURRENT SONG:
"High Enough" by Damn Yankees from a mixed tape of mine...
NEW ADDITIONS TO "ILLUSTRIO"
1 Sample DJ page, 1 Original, joined Matrix Twins fan club
CURRENT OUTFIT:
White sleeveless with blue accents, low slung jeans, blue socks
CURRENT MOOD:
Sad...


Ohayo, minnasan... Today I had to do one of the hardest things I've ever had to do... I had to break someone's heart... ::sighs::

A very kind man has come into my video store over the course of the years that I have worked there... He'd had a stroke when he was quite young and has no ability to speak or use the left side of his body... He's also a gifted artist and a very wonderful poet. I've become friends with him over the course of the years and I thought that was all he felt about me...

Today I sat with him in the park, he had bought me roses and then told me if I was his girl, I'd never have to work again... Telling him that I loved someone else has to be one the most painful things I've ever done... The look on his face reminded me of shattered glass... I thought I would cry for him at that point in time...

But I couldn't lie to him... I do love someone else so deeply that I couldn't imagine being without him...

So, I thanked him for being a friend and for being so kind to me over all these years... I then gave him a kiss on the lips... (Apparently I'm the first girl since he's had a stroke who has done so), hugged him good-bye and wished him happiness...

And now I ache inside for him, but in a way I am SO happy I was honest with him... He understands now and I know without a shadow of a doubt that I am in love with my man.

It's a hard thing to do, minnasan... But I learned today that even if it really, really hurts... Even if you have to break someone's heart (even in a kind way), honesty has been my best friend... And I know he'll be okay, and I'll be okay too...